Talk to Text Epic Fail

My daughter has a kind of unique name.  Her name is Arissa. *Not* MArissa, not CLArissa, not Melissa, but Arissa.  Yes, it's different.  And my talk to text doesn't want to recognize her name.  It fights her name with every fiber of its being. 

One time, I was texting with Scott (my husband, for readers who don't know that), and I told him, "Well, Arissa is in the tub."  It translated it to, "A wrestler is in the tub."  Needless to say, all my husband could respond with was, "?????? WHAT is in the tub????"  I had to reiterate, "Your daughter...NOT a wrestler."

Some other talk-to-text fails with her name:

-Caresses
-Services
-Reza (I don't know what that is?!?!)

That's not the only time my talk to text has epically failed.  At my former job as a preschool teacher, I was texting my assistant, who was subbing for me that day.  I was informing her that we were reviewing the letters "L M N O," but instead, it said, "L I am in Ohio."  Now, I was on the way to my grandmother's funeral, and she was kind of confused when she got a text saying I was in Ohio.

My son has a phone that sometimes likes to push all kinds of keys he didn't touch on the touch screen QWERTY keyboard when he types a text.  One time, he texted me and it said:

L Pllmyll PPS Lil roll 
lllpp0hoplnellplplplpp

LplplLll no lull poop LLD lpall
MP3 all
My phone is possessed (but he typed that last line himself)

I laughed that his phone said 'poop'.
He said it almost said "Llama lollipop"

Technology has come very far, but still makes me scratch my head...